19 December 2011

For You

Usually I don't have much to offer in the way of pictures, but I took one just for you!


Merry Christmas!



P.S. I realize it doesn't make a lot of sense to have him barefoot when he's wearing long underwear, but those piggies were so cute I had to take a picture before I put his socks on.

02 December 2011

Quoting the Cute: Page Eleven

We were eating at Winger's when my seven-year-old, watching the widescreen above my head, asked us, "Why does everyone jump on each other in football?" It was then that I realized she's never seen football before!

Three-year-old: "You don't want your little angel to get hurt/cold/hungry/lost/run over/etc..."

My two-year-old son began with"no" being the answer to everything, even when he meant yes. When he started saying "yeth," interrogations with him became much less confusing. Then he went to a slow deliberate nod, no words...but the phase he's in right now is my favorite so far: "Um...(pausing to think) sure!" Dinnertime makes me laugh. "Do you want more milk?" "Um...sure!" "Do you want more bread?" "Um...sure." You get the idea.

Seven-year-old: "Mom, what is that stomping sound?" (Mom: "Oh, that's someone listening to loud music.")

Apparently my three-year-old didn't realize she was being quizzed on letter sounds by her big sister because when asked, "What sound does B make?" she said, "Bzzzzzzzzz...."

Two-year-old: "MOoooOm; Wheh ah you?" Or when I call him he often says, "I comin'!" (I guess it's good we don't live in a bigger house, yes?)

My six-week-old baby now gurgles and goos and sometimes even says "Wow." He always talks to me with a smile on his little lips. Wouldn't it be nice if everyone did that?

15 November 2011

A Quarter Pounder Plus Ten

It's amazing the kind of compliments you get when you give birth to a big baby. "What a woman" is what I have heard the most. It reminds me of men and fishing. I'm telling you, this baby is a keeper.

There were two other babies in the nursery at the same time with my baby and they both weighed six pounds and some ounces. The pediatrician told the nurses not to put my baby next to those other babies because he might eat one of them! Ha!

One of the nurses told me she had to do my son's footprints twice because his feet were so big they went off the end of the card.

My husband was a ten pound baby. I have to say I'm secretly a little proud that I outdid my mother-in-law on something, which has never happened before and is unlikely to ever happen again.

Which is probably why in the beginning if someone said anything about my ten pound baby, I would correct them by saying, "Ten pounds AND FOUR OUNCES. That's a whole 'nother stick of butter."

Speaking of sticks of butter, my best friend made a cookie costume for my baby for Halloween. He looked so yummy.

This costume was appropriate, don't you think (since cookies [and babies] go with milk)?

08 November 2011

My Dear Lil' Sister,

There are little clues in every room of my house that remind me of how much you must love me.

The front room is the place where Baby spends most of his time, swaddled in the soft yellow afghan you crocheted for him.

Every morning in the kitchen I spread sweet honey from the jar you boiled for me after it sat crystallized in the cupboard for way too long.

When Halloween was over, I hated to take down the happy paper bats that fluttered over the dining room table all those weeks...I probably would have never gotten around to hanging them.

The DVD player still sits unconnected in the back room, but I love that you tried. I still haven't tried.

My favorite movie (the one you watched with me in the family room the night before I gave birth) still sits on top of the entertainment center. I should put it away now.

In the laundry room, the pink bottle of baby detergent you brought pours out fresh-smelling blessings every day.

The guest bedroom where you slept seems so empty now.

Every night Baby slumbers in my room in the cradle you helped me put together, the one our father made for me when I was still in the womb myself.

When I see the material you ironed (I'm so sorry you got burned!) hanging under my daughter's bed, I will always remember how determined you were to help me finish my long overdue unfinished projects.

In the boys' room, there's a pumpkin bucket that is empty because Baby did not gather candy when he went trick-or-treating (but next year he will). How did you know my children needed trick-or-treating buckets? You are perfect for me, Lil' Sister.

Whenever I see the fingernail polish in the bathroom I will remember how you carefully painted each of my fingers and toes and gently rubbed my swollen, tired feet. And the hair conditioner you gifted smells like mint, but also like care if care had a smell.

I am daily reminded of how grateful I am for you when I see the hair on each child's head, lovingly trimmed and softly strengthened by your talented hands.

As you battled your own first trimester fatigue (and sickness that lasts much longer than morning), you helped me prepare for the end of my last trimester, most likely the last one I will ever have.

You made the end special, which made a special beginning for all of us.

Thank you.

Love,
The Biggest Sister

07 November 2011

Improving Home: The Girls' Room

I may have a disorder.

Or a problem with disorder.

I may have a disorder which causes me to live in disorder because I have to do things in my own order (which should probably be called my own disorder because often the order in which I do things does not correspond with my priorities).

I may have a disorder disorder. Is this possible?

If none of that made sense, do not worry. I was just trying to explain why I have not posted for more than a month: because I have not yet finished the girls' room.

There are so many posts in between that should have been written (for example, I could tell you about how I birthed a ten and a quarter pound baby), but I could not post them or even write them until the girls' room was finished.

And it wasn't. It isn't.

Yet.

There's always tomorrow...

06 November 2011

Quoting the Cute: Page Ten

Six-year-old (after I told her not to throw dirt in her hair): "But it's pixie dust & if it doesn't get on me then I can't fly!" (Does this mean her imagination hasn't been destroyed by all of the hours she has spent watching "Jake & the Neverland Pirates" online?)

Three-year-old: All of her "-ore" words are "-oy" words instead. So, we go to the stoy & clean up the floy.

Two-year-old: "I want awful." (This is how he asks for a waffle every morning...not that we have waffles every morning.)

Six-year-old (when I asked her how she liked the pool party): "I kept getting stuck in the world pool." (Except replace the "s" sound in "stuck" with a "th," because she's lost a top front tooth.)

Three-year-old (while she shakes and shivers): "I'm not COLD!"

Two-year-old: "Yay!"

06 October 2011

Improving Home: The Girls' Room, Corner Three

I am not completely done, but I do have another corner to show you.

This is the lamp I bought at a yard sale for $3. It had a funny square lampshade with ribbon roses glued to it that I replaced with a cream-colored lampshade from Kmart for $7. It was an improvement, but still so plain.


Although I was going for plain because there is so much going on in the wallpaper, there was still something not right for me about this lamp. I was deLIGHTed when the light bulb turned on in my brain and said, "Glue some of that lace from the valance on it." So I did, and I loved it.


But then the peachness of the main section was bothering me. I planned to paint it pink, but then I got another idea that I am so excited about...mostly because I'm lazy: I taped some scrapbook paper around it.


I like the lamp so much better now, and I'm happy with the price.

So, for the tally. We were at $134. Now we add $10 for the lamp, $25 for the CD player, $10 for the toy kitchen (another yard sale), $5 for the picture frame, and $3 for the trash can = $187. As I said before, the table and chairs were free. They are not fancy by any means, but this is a table in a kid room: it's perfect.










So there you have it. Corner three. Unless I'm doing something crazy like giving birth, I hope to have the final corner ready by tomorrow night.



04 October 2011

So Close

I'm sure you have all given up on me by now. I've almost given up a few times myself, especially on Thursday night when this happened:


The accidental incident involved a couple of stitches and me thanking God repeatedly that my two-year-old did not lose an eye. I still don't feel ready to talk about the details, but let's just say that installing the anchor on the back of the dresser just jumped to the top of the to-do list.

I should have the last of the before and after pictures ready by Thursday!

21 September 2011

Improving Home: The Girls' Room, Corner Two

Did I mention the deadline was midnight?

Did I mention the deadline was just for the next corner?

The valance is finally done! I'll show it to you and then give you the long explanation of how it came to be:

First I looked and looked and looked for a plain yellow valance. Finally, I gave up and bought a yellow bedskirt from D.I. (a thrift store) for $1 and sewed a valance out of it. The only problem was, it looked like this:


I hated it. I was thinking it was going to be so easy to just use the bedskirt as it was...but then I realized the lining wasn't gathered like the front. Also I didn't like the white top. That was when I decided to crochet a top from some baby yarn I had that was the exact same color. I was happy that it also added some texture. Then I stole a cute pink bow off a hand-me-down dress that had an ink stain on it. Years ago, I salvaged this lace from some old sheets (I just couldn't throw it away). It was a little too white, so awhile back I used some Rit dye to make it cream-colored.


Then, I sewed that entire crocheted piece on by hand, both top and bottom.

Basically, what I'm saying is I spent WAY too much time making this valance. Hopefully it will seem worth it after my poked fingers heal. And at least I only spent one dollar.

Oh, and guess what I found in the window track when we were hanging the roller shade? The foot to my sewing machine! And did you spy that I painted the hands on the clock? Now I can see what time it is from across the room.

So, the price of corner number two: I don't know what I paid for the laundry hamper: maybe $15? The bedskirt-turned-valance was $1, the roller shade was $6, and so was the flower pot that came from Big Lots. This adds up to $28. Everything else was either gift or hand-me-down (the figurines, table, chairs). Tally: $106 + 28 = $134 so far.

There are only a few things left to do in this room, but my dishes are piling up.

So, I'll see you Sunday maybe?

19 September 2011

Improving Home: The Girls' Room, Corner One

So Monday's here, but I'm not. Not really.

I've been sewing until my fingers bleed (from getting poked), but I'm still not ready to show you the after shots.

The good news is, I'm getting so much more done than I would have if I hadn't told you I'd be done days ago. So thanks for that!

I do have one corner that is ready for you:


This is the reading spot I told you about. It is also the dressing area, as you can see. I cannot take credit for the idea of putting books in baskets, but I loved it from the moment I heard it (because sloppy bookshelves hurt my brain). With this set-up, even my baby can put the books away nicely!

I bought the baskets on sale at K-mart, but I don't remember what I paid for them. I think around five for the small one and ten for the big one. The frames are 12 x 12s from Michael's and I believe I paid around five each (I have three) after using a coupon. The paper-towel-holder-pretending-to-be-a-shelf/blanket-holder was in the kitchen when we moved in. I almost got rid of it until I realized how well it matched the shelf on the other side of the window. I purchased the Precious Moments clock for $6 on clearance at K-mart, but I can't read the stupid thing unless I get close. I think I'm going to try to paint its hands black. The dresser was a steal for $75 new from a furniture store. I'll have to tell you the bartering story another day, but there is a scratch on top of this dresser that I covered with this beautiful runner that a friend from Finland made for us when we got married:

The blanket and chair were gifts, so the total amount of money spent on this corner was $106. This sounds like a lot to me, but considering that I was using boxes for my girls' clothes before we got the dresser, the dresser alone has been worth that much to me.

I am giving myself a new deadline (so cool that I can do that): Wednesday, the day after tomorrow.

Fingers crossed.

15 September 2011

Improving Home: The Girls' Room After

Is today tomorrow or was that yesterday?

I've had a few snags. My sewing machine is suddenly missing all of its good feet, and you and I both know it's hard to do things when you don't have feet.

I plan to go pressure foot shopping online soon, but because I'm tired of waiting to finish the valance for the window, I started sewing the finishing touches BY HAND last night.

LIKE A PIONEER.

At this rate, it will probably be Monday before I have any pictures for you. Sorry! I do have a sort of chart. Does that excite you at all?

What We Did----------Why

Replaced carpet with vinyl
-----I already told you!
Got bunk beds
-----Because we have two daughters and this room is small
Put shelves in the closet
-----All I can say is: life was messy until we got that done!
Painted a pink room pink
-----Because we had to move the baseboards down
Turned outlets around
-----Because upside-down outlets are annoying
Framed posters
-----Because the swamp cooler made all of them ripple
Included daughter's artwork
-----Because her artwork is awesome
Put in roller shades
-----Because I hate mini blinds and 2-inch blinds are expensive
Made a valance
-----Because I couldn't find a plain yellow one at K-or-Walmart
Shopped at K-or-Walmart
-----Because I have no where else to shop *sniff*
Gave up on yellow bedspreads
-----The only ones I could find online were too expensive or cheap
Bought cream bedspreads
-----BECAUSE THEY WERE ONLY $18 EACH!
Removed kids' bookshelf
-----Because kids' bookshelves always look sloppy to me
Designed throw pillows
-----Because it saved me a lot of money
Glued lace on the lampshade
-----How could I not?

*Acknowledgments: 1. My friend's husband Steve helped with the shelving while they were here ON VACATION. Isn't that nice? 2. My best friend helped me paint the pink room pink. 3. My husband helped me turned the outlets around because I'm way too chicken to try to do something like that myself. I'm also afraid of lightening.

13 September 2011

Improving Home: The Girls' Room Before

Now that I have only about a month left before the baby comes, I'm starting to panic about all of my unfinished projects.

REMEMBER THE NURSERY?

Before we get to that, I'd like to show you what we did with the girls' room.

It started out like this:













I wrote about my joy at removing the carpet here (and let's just pretend that it hasn't been a whole YEAR since I started working on the nursery because that's just sad).

The wallpaper was still in good enough condition that with some creative arranging of posters and pictures, we could keep it until we are ready to redecorate the room (which may be never at my speed).

This was how my girls began their new lives in a pink room three years ago. The posters were a miracle. I looked for posters on allposters.com: something to hide all the nail holes. I never would have believed that among the thousands of flower posters I would find an exact match to the wallpaper trim, but I did! The picture of Jesus with the children is an old favorite that I have had since before I married.

So we could have been happy to let this room be, but as the girls have grown (my three-year-old has long since outgrown the crib), this room has become more complicated. Tomorrow I will show you how it went from a room with one bed, one crib, and one changing table, to a room with bunk beds, a table and lamp, a dresser, a reading spot, and a corner kitchen.

The word "tomorrow" may be relative, but I will try!

24 August 2011

Short Story Long

It was a morning different than any other. In a matter of a little more than an hour, I managed to go to three doctor's appointments when I had only planned on one. And when the word "cancer" made it into the mix, it just got stranger.

I had an early appointment for my son to see the dermatologist. Eczema. Bummer. I had tried to get an appointment for myself also, but they were booked until after September (which is when my met insurance deductible starts over). I figured I could put it off. After all, it was nothing but a couple of new skin-colored moles I wanted to have checked. I also wanted to ask if there was something I could put on the scar on my forehead (No, it wasn't in the shape of a lightening bolt, it was more of a red splotch on the side by my hairline).

Before we went in for my son's appointment, I figured it wouldn't hurt to ask if the doctor could fit me in if I traveled to our neighbor city. The receptionist said no, but then told me I could be seen with my son since they had had a cancellation. It turned out that the scar was actually BCC...a type of skin cancer I've never heard of. Double bummer! So he cut a piece out of it to test and we set up an appointment to have the rest surgically removed.

I was okay with the news. They assured me this type of cancer is slow growing and that it doesn't spread throughout the body. I took my toddler to his dad and returned to the pharmacy to get the cream for my son's rash. While I was there, the receptionist from my OB office came in to fill a prescription for herself. She asked me if I was ready for my appointment.

My appointment?

I didn't even realize it was time for another OB visit already. Wow. Two weeks goes by so fast anymore, but what really blew my mind was the fact that I was dressed and ready, inside the building where my OB offices are, and that the receptionist came into the pharmacy to accidentally remind me I had an appointment...like in five minutes. What are the chances of that, really?

So this morning the dermatologist removed a piece from my head about the size of a quarter. I have a rather large bandage on my head that I am supposed to leave alone for two days, which means I get to take my daughter to her first day of school looking like I had an unfortunate run-in with something or someone.

After the surgery, I got my children from the sitter and took them to Arby's for a milkshake. The only problem with that was that I forgot my purse, but didn't realize it until after I'd already ordered. I explained at the window and went home for my purse. When I returned to pay, I apologized to the worker and he excused me by saying, "That's okay. It's obvious you've bumped your head." I laughed because, seriously! It looks like this:

I know the picture is blurry...I can't take a decent picture of myself. Some of the shots didn't even have me in them!

01 August 2011

Quoting the Cute: Page Nine

In our family (and church), whenever we give a gospel-related talk or lesson or say a prayer or bear testimony, we close in the name of Jesus Christ and then say, "Amen." My six-year-old daughter gave our family home evening lesson last week. She told us the story of David and Goliath. When she was done I reminded her to close the lesson, so she said, "In the name of Jesus Christ, The End."

Three-year-old: "I wanna watch Bugs Rabbit!"

Twenty-month-old: He loves peek-a-boo and will say "Peeboo, see you!" always with a dimpled smile that makes me smile no matter how tired, grumpy, or sick I feel. The other morning, I opened my eyes to see his blue eyes only a few inches from my face. He said, "Peeboo," and ran away. I absolutely love it when he says, "Go!" to himself and then takes off running. I need to start doing that.

Time to do dishes. Go!

(P.S. This is an old post I just finally got around to posting.)

27 June 2011

Pregnancy on Me

Because pregnancy hormones squash my ability to think, I may be taking a risk writing at this time.

I have become, once again, a woman of vastly opposing emotions. I often feel that those who love me the most actually hate my guts. I tell myself that it's not true, and I know it isn't, but in my mind and heart I feel that there is not one thing they like about me. I feel like all of my friends think I'm ugly and annoying. I question my abilities as a mother. My heartaches cause more trouble than my heartburn.

The good thing is that I also experience periods of great joy and excitement. I truly feel that I have been blessed beyond what I deserve. This baby, baby number four, seems too good to be true. Every time I feel the sweet little thing swimming inside, my breath catches and I rejoice at the miracle of this perfect tiny human who will one day call me "mommy."

The other good thing is that I know the terrible feelings of darkness and loneliness will pass when the baby comes. It took me three pregnancies to figure out that it was me who changes during pregnancy, not everyone around me. This time I can just cry it out and ride it out with my eye on that light at the end of the tunnel.

And I can pretend that chocolate makes me feel better.

26 May 2011

Randomness

Yesterday I fell in love with this room on this blog. I am completely jealous of Melissa's ability to find such great deals and then put them together so beautifully.

Last Night I was awakened at 1 a.m.-ish by child #2 for a drink of water, 3 a.m.-ish: by same child to go potty (she didn't need to at 1), 5 a.m.-ish by child #1 because of a nightmare, and 6 a.m.-ish by child #3 because he thought it was time to get up. It's a good thing I fell asleep around 1o p.m. during the movie with my husband instead of the common midnight bedtime!

Today I had my 20 week ultrasound and it's a...

cute and healthy baby!

See?

25 May 2011

Too Tired to Think of a Title

My son was playing in his room for a few minutes and when I went to check on him, this is what I found in the hallway:

It was time to pick his sister up from school, so I carried him to the truck, but he fell right back to sleep.

When we got home, I put him on the futon (my girls call it the fruiton), where he finished out his nap without moving a muscle.

The reason for his drowsiness? Lately he thinks morning begins at five or six a.m. (and that it should begin then for Mommy too). Come to think of it, I could use a few naps myself.

The End

18 May 2011

If Anyone Is Still There, I'm Still Here

Okay. Pregnancy has turned my brain to mush. Sticky mush. I can't remember anything except annoying melodies that go through my head over and over and over all day long.

Some days I cry for half the day for no particular reason. Some days I'm so happy I feel I could dance.

And so blogging is a little scary.

And staring at this screen trying to think of a clever way to end this post is giving me heartburn.

Wait, no. The pregnancy is giving me that too. But today was the first time I felt Baby move. So it's all good.

Tum, ta tum tum TUMS!

21 April 2011

Amelia Bedelia Gets Lost

I wrote a long boring post telling all the reasons why I should have a cell phone. Luckily for you, I deleted it and now I offer a brief summary of my April. There are many details left out, so if you have any questions about any of the events or crises, feel free to ask.

Trip number one: Spring Break

Spring break began with me visiting the ER. Baby was fine (and oh so cute) on ultrasound so I went home happy in spite of the cramping. Later that day, I ran out of gas on the way to my daughter's appointment at the clinic. The lady who's driveway I blocked with my truck gave me a ride to the clinic (I should take her some cookies). This is the second time I have run out of gas since I got pregnant. I'm telling you, I can't think.

When the pediatrician came into the office and asked how we were doing, my three-year-old answered before I could: "We runned out of gas. Daddy's gonna be mad." After that, my patient husband rescued me from gaslessness while blushing as friends and neighbors drove by on the busy road. Somehow we got the car loaded with everything and everyone and began our more than six hour journey to be with family. We enjoyed every moment with our loved ones and the time disappeared too quickly.

Trip number two: My Sister's Wedding

The day before this trip, I tripped while helping my husband unload railroad ties from the truck. I fell while the tie fell on my thigh, badly bruising it on both sides. I knelt on the ground trying to decide if it was okay to cry like a little girl (because that was really what I wanted to do). As I limped around that evening, I wondered if I was going to have to ask the airport people for a wheelchair. By Monday, I could walk well enough to get where I needed to go, not that it was graceful or anything. I stood barefoot in the sand on a beach in Florida and watched my beautiful sister marry a wonderful man.

If only the trip home could have been so nice. The best way I can think to describe it is baseball. Picture me running the bases (pregnant and limping, no less), doing okay until third base where I head off in the wrong direction. Then I run around the perimeter of the outfield, slowing to walk through a snowstorm. Next, picture me stopping to call home four times from payphones around the outfield, never getting an answer. In between the payphone stops, I had to lay down for three naps before finally finding my way to home plate...it may sound bizarre, but that's about how it went. There wasn't any cheering when I finally made it home either, but there were some tears of relief.

Trip number three: Easter

This trip was supposed to be with my husband, but he forgot he had a job that weekend. I almost decided not to go, but I hated to change our plans for time with my foster family. Thankfully, my sister-in-law had washed all of the clothes I sent for my kids that she tended while I was in Florida (Who does that? Talk about nice!), which meant half of us were already packed.

Don't laugh, but I got lost again on the way there. Then I got stuck in rush hour construction traffic and finally gave up on finding my (foster) sister's house. She was going to watch my son while I took the girls to see the play "Beauty and the Beast." We headed to the play and made it there fifteen minutes late. You know how the beast turns into a prince at the end? That's how it went for my son only just the opposite: he was a prince through most of it, but turned into a beast at the end. At that point, I had to hold him standing in the back of the theater, and as I wrestled him I worried my pregnant hungry (the traffic jam we ate for dinner gave no sustenance) body might pass out. The play was great, though. My talented nieces and nephew were perfect.

We made it to my brother and sister's after the play, I munched on fresh vegetables and felt like my life had been saved. Sometime after midnight, the kids were finally asleep (those car naps really mess up a 7:30 bed time). The next day we had fun coloring and hunting eggs. My foster dad bought me a tracphone and I went home that night and got lost one more time, but only for a moment.

Easter Sunday was a peaceful ending to a long month of fun and folly. I sang with my husband and daughter in the church choir. The song reminded me of the great love my Savior has for me, even when I spend more time than I should being a lost sheep.

02 April 2011

April Fools Rules

When I was pregnant with my first child after more than five years of longing for motherhood, I thought it would be clever to tell all my friends the news on April Fools' Day. In a very small community, it turned out to be difficult to keep my secret that long, so somewhere in the middle of March I decided it was time to spill it.

When I found out I was pregnant this time, with my fourth child, I realized I had a second chance to do the April 1st announcement when the due date calculator on the computer told me the due date...the exact day of my oldest daughter's seventh birthday this year.

So I announced it on Friday and it was fun.

And just so you know, I wasn't really lying when I said there are three...what I meant is there are three pictures (but they are all of the same baby).

I guess it's time to finish the nursery. This is my second chance for that as well, since my son is already a year and a half old and it still isn't done. Hopefully I'll be posting pictures of the finished room before Baby is here in six months.

That doesn't give me much time!

01 April 2011

No Foolin'

It was not hard at all to pick the winner of my giveaway! Tami, you lucky duck you, I am happy to inform you that the calligraphy of your heart's desire is yours for the choosing. It couldn't have happened to a nicer commenter. We'll talk.

By way of other announcements, I had an ultrasound this morning and...

wait for it...

there were three.




Happy April Fools' Day!

19 March 2011

One Hundred Posts

When I first began this space, I only had a few goals. I wanted to share recipes and my feelings about motherhood without ever using the word "poop," I wanted to write poetry and my favorite stories about my life.

I have written at least a little of all of this, even the P word (I guess it was inevitable), along with a few other things I never planned to write.

I have seen other bloggers (I still don't really think of myself as a blogger) do give-aways to celebrate milestone numbers, so I thought it might be fun to do that here, for my lovely little handful of friends who put up with my ramblings.

So, the give-away gift to you from me, should you be randomly chosen from the comment givers, will be a handwritten custom calligraphy. You get to choose the size, color, and content!

For fun, tell me one of your favorite sayings/quotes in your comment. The winner will be chosen on April Fools' Day. Really!

18 March 2011

Daylight Losings

This is where I found my daughters yesterday at 5:00 in the evening.
If it weren't so hot in Arizona, I'd try to move there because I like how they just let time do its own thing.

16 March 2011

Just Joking

I'm not one of those people who tells jokes, mostly because I can never remember any.

I could remedy that if I put some on my blog, so here are a couple of our favorites:

Why did the elephant paint his toenails red?
(So he could hide in the strawberry patch. )
Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch?
(It works, doesn't it?)

What did the judge say when the skunk walked into the courtroom?
("Odor in the court!")

15 March 2011

A Short Story Cut Short

Continued from here

"Have you lost someone?" was all he could think to ask. The man began to sob quietly. A long, painful moment passed before he answered.

"I told her I loved her every day, but I wish I could have told her one more time. I wish I could have said good bye."

"I'm so sorry," Andrew said softly. It felt like no time had passed since his mother's death. She had told him every day as he left for school that she loved him, and he had always answered that he loved her too. Then one day she was just gone and he never had the chance to say good bye. Even though years had passed, his loss still hurt deeply.

He sat with the man for a few more minutes. Then he told him, "My wife had a baby girl last night."

For the first time, the man looked at him. With sincerity in his eyes he said, "Congratulations."

A small group of people hurried up the hallway. Andrew could tell this was the man's family, so he wished him well and got up to leave. The man stood, shook Andrew's hand and said, his voice cracking, "Cherish every day."

"I will," Andrew answered. The children and grandchildren began to hug the man and in spite of the sadness Andrew felt, he also felt an overwhelming love that made him smile for a moment as he walked back to his wife's room.

"Good morning, Sunshine," Andrew sang to his wife. "How are you feeling?" Her tired eyes twinkled as she let a crooked smile overcome her face. That was all the answer Andrew needed. "We get to take the baby home in a few hours. I got your clean clothes from the car."
"Thanks," was all she managed, but Andrew knew she was sincere. Andrew and Marie had been married for five years before they discovered they would be adding to their family. Excitement filled the months as they prepared the spare bedroom of their new home for their long-awaited child. Andrew was fascinated with the miracle growing inside the woman who was the center of his whole life. Sometimes he would wake at night with a smile after he felt the gentle kick of his child from Marie's warm abdomen. She took care of him as well as she ever had, though it took more effort than it had before. When Andrew came home from work to find his wife, eight months pregnant, scrubbing the floor on hands and knees, he was filled with a deep appreciation and admiration for her love and determination.

"Here's the little sweetie!" The nurse's loud, cheerful voice startled Andrew. The robust woman wheeled in the tiny glass-protected parcel and gently lifted the infant to her mother's arms. Marie's eyes again filled with tears as she traced the delicate lines of her daughter's tiny face. Andrew watched Marie and the baby. In his mind, he could picture the child growing over the years, sitting across from him at the dinner table.
After the nurse left, Marie looked up at him and said, "Here, hold her." He carefully took the baby from his wife's arms. In wonder, he looked at her peaceful face. They had decided on a name for her, and as he thought of this name, Marie said to him as if reading his mind, "I think we should name her Sarah."
Confused, he looked at Marie. "Are you sure?"
She nodded and said with a grin, "It fits her."
He looked at his daughter and said, "After Mother." The baby sighed, which made Andrew smile. "Thank you, Marie." He sat on the edge of the bed and took her hand in his. "I love you," he said.
As they left the hospital, Andrew walked proudly as he carried his lightweight daughter in her infant carrier. A nurse wheeled Marie in a wheelchair. Andrew felt liberated as he left the hospital. He had always felt that that place had taken his mother away. Today he left the building with a new person to treasure always.
The afternoon sun reflected from Marie's face as they made their way outside. Andrew couldn't help looking at her. As they walked down the sidewalk, he didn't notice the crocus buds reaching up through the thin layer of snow.

14 March 2011

A Short Story Cut Short, Part One

I have a booklet of collected stories and poetry from my old town. In it, is a story I wrote when I was in high school. Thinking I surely had a copy of this story in my file, I decided I didn't need the booklet anymore. Instead of throwing it away, I have been using the blank back sides of the pages to jot down recipes I want to try. After I try the recipes, I've been ripping the pages out to either discard or copy into my recipe book.

About a month ago, while looking for a recipe, I began to read my story from the booklet. It ended mid sentence along a ripped half page. Curious to read the rest of it again, I went to my file, but it wasn't there. It was then that I remembered I probably had it saved on an old floppy disk, which I had most surely thrown away long ago because my new computer does not read floppy disks.

I know how the story ends, but I'm trying to decide if it is worth rewriting. So, here is the first half (with some editing because I have every right, don't I?):

Caught in the transition from winter to spring, the tired man shielded his bare arms from the crisp breeze. If his wife had been with him, she would have reminded him to wear his jacket, but she was lightly sleeping in a hospital bed inside. He walked away from the front of the towering building and tried to remember where he had parked the car. It seemed to him that weeks had passed since they had hurried there the night before.

The day had been cold and gray. The glistening, wet pavement rushed beneath them as they sped to the hospital. After their arrival, everything was a blur. It all happened so quickly. This was only the second time Andrew had ever been to a hospital. Until now, he had avoided hospitals with great effort. If it weren't for Marie, there were many things that Andrew would never have dared to face again.

He didn't like to walk the long hallways of the hospital, even though it felt good to stretch his cramping legs. This place brought back too many unwanted memories. He told himself that he was over all of that, but when he reached the lobby and saw a man sitting on a long couch with his head bowed to his lap, for a fractured moment he thought it was his father who grieved there. He quickly scolded himself, knowing his father was miles away.

Andrew hesitantly put the overnight bag he was carrying on the floor and sat down next to the trembling man. Firmly, he put his hand on the man's strong shoulder. "Have you lost someone?" was all...

And there it is. So, should I finish it?

08 March 2011

The Clumsy Curse

Yesterday I read a post that reminded me so much of myself in younger days. It seems I have learned from experience enough to function now, but for a lot of years I was so clumsy it was almost dangerous.

For example, it wasn't uncommon for someone meeting me for the first time to hear first from me something like, "Ow, I just fell into that bush and now I'm bleeding. And look at my nylons!" Remember that coat rack thing I hit my head on repeatedly for eight years? And then there was that date that ended (before it began) with me in the ditch, muddy water dripping from my hair, dress ripped and shriveled wherever it was wet. Lucky for my date, I went home instead of to the dance.

No one was surprised when I burned my eyelids after opening the radiator cap on my overheated car. When I graduated from high school, my family sat on the edges of their seats as I walked, willing me to make it without tripping in front of the stadium-filled audience. Two years later, they did it again when I received my associate of science from the local college.

There is a reason I avoided jobs like waitressing (I probably should have also avoided that job that involved a meat slicer).

My early years as a wife were treacherous. It seemed like I cut myself while preparing food at least once a week. I locked myself out of our apartment or car so many times, it began to feel like a habit. My husband got to the point where he would just shake his head because he knew there was nothing he could do about me.

Like a gangly teenager struggles as he gets used to his changing body, I eventually matured into the semi-normal person I am today. I rarely have run-ins with knives or the iron anymore, and though I locked myself (and the four children that were with me) out of our vehicle just last week at the library, I can't even recall the last time that happened because it was so long ago.

I hope this lasts because I've heard that growing old is really hard. I'd like to do it gracefully if I can.

04 March 2011

Tasty Clean

I am one of those people who reads in the shower. I read shampoo bottles and tubes of shower gel just because they are there. I probably should start laminating better reading material to take in there, but for now, this works for me. I always like to travel to my mother in law's house for a change of genre. So far, I like what Irish Spring has to say more than the others.

Not long ago, I discovered that the shave cream for women I bought at the dollar store has butane, propane, and isobutane for the sixth, seventh, and eighth ingredients. The next time I used it, I couldn't believe I didn't notice the distinct smell of those liquefied gases the first time. The peach fragrance just can't hide it. I find it hard to believe that propane and butane are good for my skin, even when they are mixed with Aloe juice and Vitamin E. But then again, I use coal tar shampoo to help with my itchy scalp, so you never know. Regardless, I plan to throw that extremely flammable container (that may explode if heated) out and use the body butter I got for Christmas instead.

Today I realized it appears I'm in danger of being barbecued...I mean, I've got the propane, butane, and coal. Then I baste myself in butter, garnish with apples & raspberries: next it could be all over.

Good thing there's all that water.

02 March 2011

Found a Peanut

He told me he wasn't feeling well when he got home from work. I gave him a hug. After dinner he went to orchestra practice. We watched a movie when he got home. As we climbed into bed that night, he said his stomach was hurting again. I told him I was sorry and rolled over to go to sleep.

Not long later, he was complaining again. He said it was hurting more on his right side now, but it felt better when he laid on that side. "Appendix?" we groggily asked each other. I said, "Well tell me if you think it is and I'll take you to the emergency room."

He moaned through the night and I tried to stay awake so he wouldn't think I didn't believe him (I did) or that I didn't care (I did). Sometime around 4:30 am, he decided we should go. He took a shower while I bundled up our sleeping children and began carrying them to our vehicle. I had thrown on a denim gingham jumper dress because I couldn't find any clean pants in my rush, but because it was cold, I wore my white thermal pants under it and my red college sweatshirt over it. It was too cold for dressy shoes, so I wore white athletic socks with my blue-gray fake converse shoes. I figured I wouldn't be seen by very many and I could change in a few hours. The cold air woke the children as I took them outside, but I knew it was nothing a good nap couldn't cure later on. I could have called a friend, but I hated to wake anyone up so early.

I bought a vending machine breakfast for the children to eat while we waited in the ER waiting room. I wished I could sit with my husband, but the sign said only one visitor, and we were four. Thankfully, one of my husband's coworkers saw us there and offered to sit with my little sleepy heads while I went in to reassure my husband.

When I returned to the waiting room, our smart friend had turned the television to cartoons. Mickey Mouse kept the children happy while we waited for the diagnosis. When the doctor came into the room, I could read the answer on his face. I was relieved when he told me that it had not burst. Surgery would be soon. I asked him if I could bring the children in to see their dad before I found somewhere for them to go. He agreed.

We walked into the small exam room. My husband smiled weakly, his face pale. One by one, the children kissed him. I loaded the babies (yes, I still call them that) into the double stroller and told my husband I'd be back soon.

Though fairly calm, I was in a rush. First, I needed to get my oldest daughter to school. I pulled her hair into a ponytail as we stood outside in the cold. I talked to the neighbor who usually takes her to the bus stop, but her daughter was ill, so I took my daughter to the bus stop myself. This was easy to do because the babies were already in their carseats, and our truck was running with the heater blowing nice warm air.

Daughter on bus. Check.

My husband had given me some instructions to get his classroom ready for the substitute. I drove to his school and did that, checking with the office for a sub list, but it was still before 7:30 and no one was there yet.

I drove home so I could make some phone calls (it is times like these I wish I had a cell phone). I needed to call my husband's parents and let them know what was going on. I needed to find a substitute for my husband and someone to watch my kids. I only had to make two calls to fill each position and then I was off. My goal at this point was to make it back to the hospital before they took my husband in for surgery.

Even after having to run back to the school to replace a book in his classroom, I still made it to the hospital in time to spend an hour with my husband before they wheeled his bed down the hallway. I held his hand and talked to him. His hands were so cold. His hands are only cold when he is very nervous.

"Don't worry," I said. "They've been doing appendectomies for a very long time, I'm sure they have the procedure perfected." But it was the anesthesia he was afraid of. Thankfully, the anesthesiologist was convincingly positive (plus he promised to give my husband something for nerves the moment they arrived in the OR).

I made some phone calls to find an afternoon babysitter for the children. I ate lunch in the cafeteria. I read a very interesting article in a magazine about a woman who had face blindness. The doctor came to the waiting room to tell me my husband was doing fine.

After we were resettled in our room, I told my husband I had to leave to pick up kids from school and transfer all of the children to a different house. I told him to get some sleep and I'd be back soon. Of course, at this point, I remembered how silly I looked. The fact that I had not showered the day before and had no make-up on didn't make me feel any more confident in my appearance, but I didn't have time to do anything about it before pick up time. Of course, that day just had to be the last day of "eat lunch with your family" week, so there were dozens of people in the hallway to see me in all my gorgeousness.

When I saw him again, he was in a lot of pain. More morphine, more lortab, still more pain. Even though they told us we could go home, we decided to stay the night. I didn't want to take him home and not be able to help him. So I found yet another place for the children to go, this time to stay the night. And although Friday is a good night for a sleepover, I was extremely grateful for willing friends who not only took good care of my children, but asked nothing in return. So it was with everyone who babysat for me that day. And another friend made us dinner. I love people!

The rest of our stay was pretty repetitive. When he slept, I slept. When he couldn't sleep, I read to him from an Orson Scott Card book we've been reading together. When he needed to go to the bathroom, I unhooked him from his three tethers and followed him with the IV tree.

He felt much better by morning. He thanked me several times for taking care of him, but I was just relieved that he's still here to take care of me!

28 February 2011

Quoting the Cute: Page Eight

Six-year-old: "My favorite game is 'Caracal Leap.'" Me: "What's a caracal?" Six (incredulously): "You know! An African wildcat that can jump three meters high?" (Someone please tell me, did you know that?)

Two-year-old: "Don't talk to me!"

When I take my baby's picture, he now says, "Cheee!"

My father-in-law was explaining to my six-year-old over the phone how he has to tie his apron in the front and then turn it around and she said, "That's what my mom does with her bra."

Oh my.

My husband had an appendectomy. After the surgery, the nurse was checking his blood pressure when my two-year-old daughter told her, "Be careful with my daddy. He has owies."

Sixteen month old: "Ala" (this means "don't" in Finnish), "More," and my personal favorite: "Ma ma ma ma."

25 February 2011

Redo of the Do

You know how sometimes you see something or someone in a photograph and you notice things you didn't see before? Like the pictures that showed me, to my horror, that when my hair was pulled straight back into a ponytail, I looked like I had bald spots on the sides...For a long time after that, I wore my hair down only, but eventually I learned how to part my hair just right to cover my sparse spots, even with a ponytail.

So after I posted this picture here, I noticed that it was all looking a little tacky.

After thinking about it for awhile, I remembered I had another pot that would look better. It wasn't even in use because I could never find a plant small enough to go in it. I also had to re-cover the phone book because I got a new one and it was smaller.

Now I can't decide if it's better or too matchy...

15 February 2011

A Few of My Favorite Things

My husband's grandmother made this quilt for us when we got married. It was begging for a matching pillow. Thanks to some math help from my foster dad, I was able to figure out a crochet pattern. And before you go thinking that I am one of those people who can sew or crochet without a pattern, I'm not. I just got really lucky this time!

This item may seem silly, but every time I see this basket, it makes me smile inside. I got the idea from a catalog, which had this saying displayed right on the material in the basket. I thought it would be even better if it looked like it was circled and ripped out of a want ad.

I love to hide unsightly useful objects whenever I can. This pot of flowers (which is a bouquet of pens) and paper-covered phone book makes me feel like my counter top is uncluttered. (When it actually IS uncluttered, which is hardly ever, but I'm working on that!)

14 February 2011

Lily Dee

I was almost six months pregnant when my sister called to tell me she was also expecting. We talked about how fun future family gatherings would be with the little cousins playing together. I could also picture sisterly phone conversations as we passed through the motherhood phases together.

My sister's doctor recommended bed rest when her baby was nearly full term. Because her husband was serving in Iraq, I packed up my baby girl and went to stay with her as much as possible.

It was nice to just be together. I became addicted to HGTV. And when TLC had a "Clean Sweep" marathon, I was suddenly a couch potato.

I took a picture of my sister standing in the pink nursery with a rocking chair and a crib all made up behind her.

On one of her appointment days, I went home. I wish I could go back in time and change that day. I wish I would have been there with her when the doctor told her that her baby was going to die.

The next week was like a foggy dream. I longed for the right words, and the intuition to hug her at the right moment. Instead, in trying to help, I felt completely helpless.

I took her phone and talked to people so she wouldn't have to. I tried to give her space so she could cherish the time she had left with her daughter.

I was not there when Lily was born. I did not want to intrude on that private moment between my sister and her husband, who was able to come home for a couple months. I was on the way there when my dad called me. He said, "Lily didn't make it." It was Valentine's Day. I thought of the first time my baby looked at me. I cried bitterly, knowing my sister would not have that experience now.

My sister gave birth without the aid of pain medication. At birth, the baby never took a breath, but she was warm, small, and beautiful. I arrived not long after. When I walked into the hospital room, I put my baby, asleep in her carseat, in the corner. Then I went to admire the delicate features of my lost little niece. My sister asked where my daughter was. She asked to see her. My sister's love for my daughter never diminished, not even in her deepest anguish.

The funeral was a few days later. After the tiny pink coffin had been lowered into the ground, I watched as my sister bent low to the ground, almost reaching. My dad knelt on one side of her and held her hand while my mom held her arm on her other side. It was the first time in years our parents had been anywhere near each other. They came together for my sister. That moment was so painful, but somehow it was also beautiful.

I don't know many things, but I know that we are eternal, and I know God loves us.

I think it is fitting that Lily's Day will always be the day the world celebrates love.

10 February 2011

Snapshots of the Sacred Garden

Sadly, this garden has been uprooted. I'm glad I got a few pictures of it first.



I pray for my sister as she searches for a new place to plant.

08 February 2011

Living in the Sticks

Yesterday I wanted to dye. Okay: not funny. But really, I wanted to dye some lace and in previous weeks I was unable to find dye in the color I wanted at any of the four stores that might possibly sell it in my area. I had even checked Walmart last time I was in the "city," but no taupe or cream or tan. This was no surprise to me since it seems Walmart never has what I need anymore. We've been on the outs for quite awhile now, but I'm thinking about divorcing Wally for good.

Anyway, so yesterday I made it my mission to search every grocery or department store in the "city," which is almost thirty miles from my house. I even stopped at a sparsely stocked shopping center on the way, with no luck. Then came the exercise workout of harnessing and unharnessing a one-year-old and two-year-old what felt like fifty times to all of us, not to mention carrying thirty pounds of wiggly until my arms ached. Lowe's? No. Kmart? No. Family Dollar? No. Smith's? No! (But I almost laughed out loud in the laundry aisle when I heard U2 empathetically singing from above, "And I still haven't found...what I'm looking for...")

So, after searching four stores in my town, and another four in the "city," I finally found tan dye in the fifth store, which I guess was really the ninth store.

I almost giggled.

21 January 2011

Quoting the Cute: Page Seven

My oldest daughter said to me after I took away her toy for misbehaving: "When I grow up, I'm never gonna come visit you. You'll be sorry!" I turned from her and stifled a laugh, picturing my daughter as a grown woman refusing to visit me because I took away her sticky foot when she was six.

My two-year-old has the funniest vocabulary: lollipop (but she means soda pop), honeybird (but she means hummingbird), woman noodles (but she means Ramen noodles, which makes me laugh, especially because of this). I absolutely love the way she says her sister's name. A couple of weeks ago, she had a nasty cold and every time she'd cough and I'd sympathize, she'd say, "I not sick. I just sneezing a little."

My baby has gone verbal. He loves to say "hi!" (especially to strangers), sometimes "bye," but he loves "hi" the best. He says "uh-uh" instead of "uh-oh," and it's very endearing with his gravelly little boy voice (which is still so intriguing to me after two girls). His answer to literally everything is a whiny two-toned "no!" (even when he really means "yes"). As you can imagine, I can have a lot of fun with this.

17 January 2011

I Remember

Yesterday as I sat in church, three children climbing over me, taking turns in my lap (sometimes two at a time), I kissed each one as they came close to me. With each kiss also came a silent prayer of gratitude to my Father in Heaven.

Ten years ago, every Sunday I sat quietly on a bench by my husband, often wiping tears as I turned my internal conversations to God. I prayed for a miracle. I prayed for a baby as I listened to the noise of all of the children around me.

With time (years), I began to pray for joy instead of babies. I clung to the hope that the loving atonement of my Savior could heal my aching mother heart, even if I never became a mother in this life. I prayed for strength to say, "Thy will be done" and really mean it.

God is love. The gift He gave to me, the answer to that prayer, is one of my greatest treasures (and I love that it is also a blessing to my children). I thank Him every day for my happiness: the happiness that comes because of Him, not because of them. My children do make me happy, yes! But I understand that the joy He gave to me (before I knew my children existed) is eternal.

It is a good thing, because I can see that they are going to grow up and go away long before I am ready!

08 January 2011

Life's Messy Lessons

As a mother, I've witnessed how a lot of accomplishments come after a messy process. For example, when a toddler first begins self-feeding with a spoon, it never fails that more of the food ends up everywhere else than in the mouth. And don't even get me started about potty training...

And then there's learning to roller skate or ride a bike without training wheels...

Sometimes I forget that one of the main reasons I am here is to learn as I wallow down the muddy pathways or trails that seem to have more stumbling blocks than stepping stones.

In the end, all of those messy misses and painful crashes and overwhelming regrets add up to wisdom and the gratitude that only comes with hindsight.

It helps to know there is One who has taken this path before. He made it safely Home, and because of Him, I can too.



Proverbs 3: 5-6

"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways, acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths."